Fasting Month

Selamat Menunaikan Ibadah Puasa untuk semua. This year is a new experience of fasting month for me. Because this year i am fasting while breastfeeding. It is a challenge. First day of Ramadhan, around 10 in the morning I already felt dizzy. Then I had a short nap and after that is alright. I got through the first day so hopefully I can fast all the way.

Just done expressing.Production today lack a bit. Maybe it is normal for fasting breastfeed mother. Yesterday I made roti jala. Today is working day so it is bibik's cooking menu this evening.Hehe..asked her to cook sup ikan merah. But still for back-up will try to find something at pasar ramadhan. Any suggestion? Maybe ayam golek...

Okay, brain kind of lemau today..My tummy already singing but have to hang on.. chowzzz

Domestic Helper

I hired a domestic helper when shakeel was born. This is my first time hiring a maid. At first, I wanted to send adlan and shakeel to adlan's babysitter house but since our babysitter also just have a new baby we decided to have a domestic helper.

Our maid is from Pulau Boyan. So far she's ok but still I dont feel quite comfortable with a stranger in the house. The aora is different. Actually she is really helpful around the house and she also takes care of shakeel very well. But I still dont feel comfortable.

I dont want to feel this way but still the feeling of loya and meluat still there. Adlan also feels the same way. When we want to go somewhere he doesnt want the bibik to follow.

When I am at home, I dont want her to hold my baby. Only if I need her help then I allow her to hold shakeel. I dont want my baby to be attach to her. I think adlan also get bored staying at home all the time. Cant wait to send him to tadika next year.

But to think back, if we dont have a maid it will harder for us since we live quite far from office now. I hope everything will goes well and I can get used of having a maid in the house.

My handsome children

My boys are so handsome. I dont know who they resemblence to. It is hard to believe that they are ours. :). Anyway, as usual praise to God for the 'pemberian'. All that I wish and hope now is that I can raise them good so that as good as their look is as good as their behaviour and iman. Insya Allah.

Reality Check

Last week i suddenly i receive a notice on my yahoo. Somebody that i have not been spoken or see for a long long time suddenly request to add me as a contact. What a shock it is none other that my ex.

He was my bf when i was in mrsm muar. We broke up i think when i was in matric or when i was in uni. I cant remember exactly because since we start as couple when we were in form 5, we broke up and get back together for several times.

In my life i have only 2 memorable and meaningful relationship with a guy. First of course my beloved husband and second is with my ex. I donno why but even after many many years in my heart i still kept the memory and thougt about my ex. We connect is so many things but we cant keep our relationship together for what reason at first i donno why. I still remember the first break up. We just lost contact for several years. It start we an argument the both of us just kept silence and then 'lost' contact.

Then one day i accidently bump with him in my hometown and from there on we just click back together. All past argument just forgotten. Then we broke up again, after that i just can not get my mind out of him and send him i think a gongxi fa chai card as a joke then we get together again after that. After for a while we broke up again. Each time we broke up, the way our relationship ends usually when both of us just keep silence. Itis always like that.

The last argument that lead to the last break up is when i just fed up with him because usually im the one who wants to see him(at that time we were in uni.). When semester break i always want to see him, but it is me who actully beriya2 to see him. After some time i began to get fed up and we argue when at one time i want to see him but he doesnt. It ended in that phone call. I thougt he will contact me after that argument but he doesnt. I wait n wait I refuse to call him because i want to see his real feeling towards me..but he never calls.

Until I finish my studies, nobody seems right and good enough to me. Until i met my hubby now during my practical. Usually when we found somebody that is trully for u, u just know.

Back to the present, suddennly he add me in yahoo but I waited for him to message me. As usual he is the old ego im sure he waits for me to tegur him first. So what the heck i tegur him first to wish him Selamat Pengantin Baru. opps i fail to mention that he got married around the time i gave birth to my precious shakeel.

So we chat after so many2 years (I think about 9-10 years ago). The feeling is mutual. I know he still remembers me as somebody that once touches his heart. But I feel relieve just to have to be inc ontact with him again. Because all this while, I always wonder a what if situation with him. From that chat I realise he is really not the one for me. He is too ego for me an I also have my own ego. We can never be happy together forever. We do click but there are things that we just can not get a perfect understanding. I am happy now to know that i really made a right choice to marry my husband. He is really the one that really suits me. It make me fall all over again with my hubby. I thank GOD for this. Really thankful..Syukurr. Now, I can say that without a doubt I wish him a happy good life. Sayonara to 'us' and we can be really just friends.

P/s: My treasure..

Jaundice Baby

My new baby have jaundice after few days born.

He is warded in An-Nur Specialist center. I brought her home from Serdang hospital under my own risk because i can not stand to be left alone at the hospital. In an-nur my hubby and son sleeps with me. The reading when he was admitted is 17.

I am so sad when he was under the uv-light. But to think back, what about those baby that were premature that have to be put in the incubator. I have to be thankful.

He was warded for 2 days only. But what i want to share here is that after a week i have a follow to the clinics. Dr Arbayah the pediatrician says that actually now there are a service for jaundice baby where it provides the UV light setup at home. It cost half from the hospital bills if your baby is warded in private hospitals. Because for new mother, after giving birth is a tired and restless period. It is more comfortable to stay at home that in hospital. So for me this service is very good. Next time if my next baby have jaundice I will certainly opt for this service where i can give the treatment at home.

Shakeel Aydin Mohamad Syahidan

Well..my friend persuade me to continue to write my blog here. Ntah ler..actually i dont actually know what to write in my blog. Anyway just want to update the things that going on with my life.
I gave birth to a healthy boy on the 25th April 2006. New addition to my family is named Shakeel Aydin with the name meaning is handsome and intelligent. Isnt he handsome already.
He is 4 month old now.This time I breastfeed my son successfully and proud of it. For new/to be mothers out there, my advice is breastfeed your baby. I failed to breastfeed my older son so I know the difference when u breastfeed or not.
Breastfeed have so many advantages. All the good things written and said about breastfeed is true. My baby until now have never been sick yet. Alhamdulillah. And you will feel satify when breastfeeding your baby like u r doing the best for him.
But breastfeeding is not that easy..you have to be kuat semangat to try and never quit to try.The tips is dont ever give your baby bottle fed for the first few weeks untill he is consider expert to attach to your breast.
Every day i look forward to come home from work just to snuggle with my baby.Being a mother is the best thing ever happen in my life now even with 2 ceasarian.
But as usual, not everything run smooth from the day u gave birth but i am lucky to have a husband that understands and support all the way.With each children, you learn new thing and gain new experience. Sometimes I feel like i want to be a consultant for young mothers. :)
I hope that I can raise my children well and give them the best that I can. Wish me luck.